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Beatrice416
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Name: You may call me Beatrice
Country: United States
Birthday: 7/25/1983
Gender: Female
Expertise: I am an expert at living a contented day-to-day life.
Occupation: Student
Message: message me
Member Since:
3/24/2004
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| is one of the oddest professions. One of my challenges gave me one of the highest compliments ever: "You're such a pain in the butt. But in a good way." I've always assured him that yes, I am paid to be his personal pain in the butt.
Ah. Students.
Today I explained to one of my classes why you can't say "I love you" to just anyone. And why someone's boss can say, "Oh gosh, I just love you!!" after a job well done.
Conversation with the appointment line for the doctor:
And what do you need to see the doctor for?
Um, I have a sore on my tongue. First it was red, then white, and now it's yellow.
Oh, um, yeah. Okay. (I wish I could give her inflection...)
I hope they don't have to cut too much of my tongue away.
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| I have been informed that my previous blog wasn't good enough.
I can understand that.
Today I was practically accused by a collection's agency for harassing them. I think that's because I've been calling once or twice a month since March, asking them to do their job. Please bill my insurance company. I don't have a bill. I don't have access to a bill. Please bill them. If insurance denies the claim, I will pay you. They say: you must have a bill; they tried to bill you from March until January. I explain AGAIN that *they* sent the bill to the courthouse, because that's where I got picked up on jury duty. I'VE NEVER GOTTEN A BILL. They say I should file a claim myself. Problems with this: 1) they said they would do that 2) I have no bill with which to do this.
I called the hospital, even though I've been told not to, requesting a bill, which they are mailing to me today, and I've written a lengthy letter to the insurance company respectfully asking them to consider paying the claim, even though it's waaay past timely filing, because the agency that was supposed to do the timely filing, didn't. If they don't pay it, I'll call HCMC and explain the problems I've had with the agency and see if I can pay HCMC directly and have no more to do with the agency until I report them to the BBB.
I also have no job and no prospects. I have to have health insurance (MUCH GOOD THAT DID ME IN MARCH '07), and it looks like I'll have to start buying it privately, so I'll have no job, no prospects, and severe drainage to my funds.
I need a little good news. Soon. I cried today for the first time in, I don't know how long. Fortunately that was after the conversation.
It's so much easier to deal with my health problems than the horrible mess that all started with jury duty. I think that's the silver lining. I know now that it could be so much worse, and I'm far less afraid. I'm also much more aware of my rights. Maybe there are some good things. Also, my credit score isn't going down, and the agency can't post without HCMC's permission. HCMC seems to have forgotten I exist, so 
I probably shouldn't have written this, and I probably shouldn't post it. But my head hurts, and my drugs aren't helping today. And I have to go have bloodwork to make sure that my latest experimental pill isn't causing my kidneys to shut down, and I hate needles, and MinuteClinic can't do that test, so I think I'll actually have to see a doctor and then get the test. That's a lot of $ out of my pocket. And I'm expected to do it 3-4x/yr.
I feel like I should now write something positive. Two of the people I love most in the world are getting married soon, one in August and one in October. I'm very excited about this. Yay for creative present making. I am getting continuous compliments on my work this past year, which is encouraging as I try to find jobs, even if there is a lot of rejection in that area. I don't have glaucoma and am off the pill that could have caused it to develop.
Also!!!! I have the best haircut ever. Four years of growth (over two usable feet) have been donated to Locks of Love (that may be the wrong preposition), and I have the cutest short summer haircut. And! I'm going to spend $2.75 on henna and turn it red. At this length, $2.75 may give me three dyes worth. I love my cousin! She cuts hair oh so well.
Finally, I am currently watching Spike and Andrew go on their mission-mission, debating curly fries vs the onion flower. I just love those conversations.
I hope you have a lovely day.
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| xanga keeps sending me "we miss you" emails.
Maybe this will make it stop.
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| It has been a hard week.
I collapsed during a grant writing in-service at the MLC on Thursday. Fellow VISTAs surrounded me and said things like, do you know where you are, do you know what day it is, stay with me Rachel...
I missed the second half of the in-service. My fellow VISTAs who stayed with me were well-pleased. I got them out of an hour and a half of grant writing boredom. It was less pleasant for me, as I kept doing my terrible pain-pain-pain-everywhere-shaking-fetal-position thing. Then someone drove me home and took the train to her house.
I then made the truly stupid mistake of thinking that lying down for a couple of hours would have me well enough for the pastor's dessert. Ha. Ha. Ha. Oh my. Ha. Ha. Ha.
I went. Enjoyed myself until.about 8:30, at which point I knew I should get up and go, but I couldn't really make myself do it. Oh my. About 9:15 when we started to head out, I stood up and fell into a pathetic heap into a chair. A chair with a person in it. I think that fall might be where the bruises are from. I got up and tried again. I almost made it to the door that time. Of course, by then they'd voted that the pastors and wives would take me home. Well, that started two of the most awkwardly uncomfortable and painful hours of my life on this side of the Atlantic Ocean. I haven't had an attack that bad in the US. It was actually worse than last fall. I shook, fought off tears effectively by biting through my lip, and eventually quit breathing. I don't know how long that lasted.
I took a sick day on Friday.
I pretty much was in bed or on the couch Friday, Saturday, Sunday after church. Miserable at work today, but no collapse. Is the spell over? I couldn't tell you, primarily because I have NO IDEA what caused it to begin with. There's usually some trigger I can identify.
I have put in a call to the neurologist.
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